Grief

Noun ~ a cause or occasion of keen distress or sorrow caused by someone’s death
Idiom ~ to suffer disappointment, misfortune, or other trouble: fail:

As this year comes to end in a few short days, I find myself reflecting on all that
has transpired this year, the loss of a very dear friend, a mother whose child is very ill and the hope of becoming part of a new clinical trial unsuccessful. Learning to let go of choices made that cannot be changed. Grief is inevitable the death of a loved one I believe is one of the hardest things to accept. For me I was very lucky to have several months to say good-bye and enjoy Sandy’s company. Many do not get this opportunity because their loved ones died suddenly and unexpectedly. As I sat with Sandy at the end of her journey, I noticed many friends and family didn’t know what to do or say. So, this blog entry will focus on how you can help someone who has lost a loved one.

Below are some tips on ways to help someone who just lost a loved one.

• Listen: those grieving want to be heard, let them tell you about their loss. Let them tell you what they need. Never presume you know what may be best.
• Share: If you have a beautiful memory of their loved one share it, they want to hear fond memories of their loved ones. It is said that laughter is not appropriate at a time of loss. I believe that a friendly smile or laugh can ease the pain remind them of how their loved one would make others smile or laugh.
• Be there: Don’t stay away because you’re afraid that you may say or do the wrong thing. Your physical presence lets them know your there for them.
• Be patient: grief takes time and is different for everyone, don’t rush them, and allow them to share their memories and feelings.
• Remember: The first year is typically the hardest, share those special dates, birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, date of their death. It won’t be easy; their life is forever changed and will continue to change as they journey through their grief. The healing process will happen gradually, the loss however always remains.

“The only cure for grief is to grieve” Earl Grollman


Sandy you are missed everyday